You’re an awesome person and I really value our friendship, but I like you as more than a friend and I’d like to take you out on an actual date.If you don’t feel the same way, that’s completely fine: I’m happy being friends with you no matter whether we date or not and this doesn’t change anything.You know her better than I do, so hopefully you’ve got a grasp on how she’d handle being approached by another woman. well, I’d say approach with caution.) But regardless of the circumstances, the fact of the matter is: you’re in a platonic relationship that you would like to turn into a romantic or sexual one.
If you’re continually trying to read meaning into the tone of her voice or the particular way she phrased things, then you already know how things are likely going to go. Let’s say that you’ve gotten enough of a feel for things that you’re ready to take the plunge. However, instead of the usual fantasies you play out, we’re going to switch roles.
You will be the person being asked out, rather than the one doing the asking.
If you want to ask her out, you have to make the moment happen.
It doesn’t need to be elaborate; in fact, making a production out of things is more likely to make her uncomfortable and put on the spot.
So I want you to imagine what it would be like if a close but utterly platonic friend told you that they (he or she, your choice) has a crush on you and wanted to go on a date with you.
Ignore the impulse to just leap to “Well, I’d say yes! Have they been holding this in the entire time, or did they catch the feels recently? Will you be able to stay friends afterwards, or will you become one of those ex-couples that can’t stand each other after a break up? Think about all of this carefully, because these are all the thoughts that are going to go through That last one is especially important; odds are good that this could come like a giant space flea from nowhere and she may have to take a few minutes to hard reboot her brain. Start with giving her permission use the l-word; it’s intimidating at best and can leave her feeling overwhelmed and uncomfortable).Instead, it’s better to simply find time to hang out together and make an opportunity to say “I want to talk to you about something.Nothing bad, I promise.” If at all possible, try to do this at an emotional high-point: you’ve had a great day together and you’re both enjoying each other’s company.Does she make little preening gestures when she sees you?Is she more physical with you than she is with her other friends?” and think about how you would feel about being asked out by a friend. If you push for an answer right then and there, you’re more likely to get a reflexive “no,” regardless of how she may feel if she were given some time. Then establish that this doesn’t change anything, you’re tight and you’ll stay that way.